sweet sixteen...

It's been a really interesting few weeks. I had to sublet my apartment for the time being, and am staying with various friends through the month of November. Interesting times in my life as I work hard to try and transform my career helping others. So with that, let me express my gratitude for...

1. Amazingly generous friends. A big set of thank yous to Tanya & Zach, Rachel, Caitanya & Jon & Jenn, Victoria and anyone else who puts me up for a few days this month to help while I'm going through a stressful, but oh-so important phase of my life. I appreciate all your help.

2. Obama winning and changing the course of history. A huge weight has been lifted knowing that 8 years of having one of the most incompetent political leaders in all of history is drawing to a close and being replaced with someone who has sought to do good in their life and will help get America back on track. I am honored to be a part of this history in the making.

3. Learning better discipline is vital to me getting through the next few weeks and I am thankful for this opportunity to approach that area of my life. I've always been extremely disciplined with jobs when working for others, but I am realizing that I am not that great at staying focused when it's just for me. Without a home, I'm a bit scattered, so it's a great challenge to figure out how to retain mental clarity under financial stress and uncertainty, and I'm learning to go even deeper into my trust in the universe that it will all work out however it is supposed to.

4. Challenging my views of money has been a long time coming. I know that my views of money have long been responsible for my lack of it, but trying to change that has been really difficult. Negotiating with my last job because of the mere pittance their initial offer was for was the first big step in sticking up for myself and acknowledging that I too deserve wealth. Better that it is put in the hands of someone ethical who will do good things with it than the giant corporations who only serve to harm the people and make big profits while doing it. Reading Mike Adams' "7 Principles of Mindful Wealth" was extremely helpful in helping me acknowledge the things I had been trying to put into words the last few years on this topic.

5. The gigs section on craiglist has been my primary source for odds and ends these days. It definitely beats going back to another office job for right now.

6. Ethiopian spices have been rocking my world even more than normal.

7. Borrowing Caitanya's laptop has allowed me to fit in some blogging and get a ton of other things done. Thanks for making the sacrifice, Cai. I really appreciate it.

8. Raw eggplant pizzas. Made some in the dehydrator this week by slicing up a big fat eggplant into mini-pie crusts, coating with olive oil, and topping with fresh basil, tomato, garlic, mushrooms and nutritional yeast. Delicious.

9. Breath. My energy has been very scattered the past week with the lack of stability in my life right now, so I've been trying to hold onto the things that keep me grounded - breath, yoga, meditation, presence. I noticed that as soon as I didn't have my own space, I lost sight of those principles for a few days and my energy started to slowly scatter. I think it's absolutely possible and necessary to do all those things without a home base - if anything, it's even more necessary now than ever before.

10. Girls night at Kendra's was nice and mellow. Her house is amazing, and there was some amazing spontaneous live music that completely made my night. Kendra herself is an amazing person and I'm glad I got to talk to her more about life and the AIDS risk work she does. It's pretty amazing. We spoke a lot about how great it is to be helping people who want help. I have a lot of people in my life who don't even help themselves, and it can be really frustrating at times, so I'm extremely grateful to be working with people who actually want to change their lives instead of conceptualizing about it.

11.Sanity. I am extremely thankful for possessing all my faculties, when clearly there are so many people out there who do not. When I was in college, my biggest fear was ending up in an insane asylum or ending up just like some of the crazy, rambling homeless people I would pass on the straight. Every time I see someone like that, I pause and give thanks for having found raw foods and finally healing my mental anguish. I no longer have that fear of ending up like that, because for the first time I am certain I will never end up that way.

12. My pillow. I slept the past few nights without it, but last night finally remembered to bring it with me and slept so much better. Flannel=comfort.

13. The Edge of Heaven was amazing. It's a Turkish-German film written and directed by Fatih Akın. Here's the trailer. It doesn't really give you the gist of the movie, but it touches on a fair amount of it.I highly recommend renting the whole thing.



14. Rap sessions with a few friends trying to work out the best way to handle a situation that's been affecting us all.

15. Frank totally hyped me up about all the things I'm doing and helped waver off the stress I had been holding onto simply by reminding me who I am. Thanks, Frank!

16. Communal dinners at Tanya and Zach's apartment are a recurring event and always full of love and laughter.

17. Medjool dates from the Alemany Farmer's market. There's one guy there with the freshest, juiciest, most delicious dates. I buy like 2 pounds a week. Medjools are the 'king of dates' because they were once reserved for Moroccan royalty and their guests. They definitely make me feel like royalty. Yum.

18. Learning about cancer from my friends' experiences with it has really been usefully in guiding me towards understand new ways to help people. Thanks Jim & Frank for sharing your memories of those you lost. May you find comfort in the fact that their stories will help others.

19. Breaks. Jenn was playing some amazing beats while she was unpacking. I think I need to give her a spindle of blank CDs.

20. CIIS Public Programs. For anyone who is in San Francisco, CIIS had some really amazing programs worth checking out. When I had steady income, I frequented them.

21. CIIS deserves it's own listing. The California Institute of Integral Studies is a huge blessing. It's so amazing to be able to stud the things they offer. If I could go to one school continuously for the rest of my life, this would probably be it. Any place that agrees with me about the merits of bass therapy is a winner!